Handfasting Ceremony

The Wedding of Phyllis & Cynthia


Welcome, all.

Phyllis and Cynthia, know now, before you go further, that since your lives have crossed in this life and you have formed ties between each other, that as you seek to enter this state of matrimony you should strive to make real the ideals which give meaning to both this ceremony and the institution of marriage.

With full awareness, know that within this circle you are not only declaring your intent to be handfasted before your friends and family, but that the promises made today and the ties that are bound here greatly strengthen your union and both your souls’ growth.

Do you still seek to enter this ceremony?

PHYLLIS & CYNTHIA: YES, WE SEEK TO ENTER.

I ask you look into each other’s eyes.

Phyllis, Will you cause Cynthia pain?

PHYLLIS: I MAY.

Is that your intent?

PHYLLIS: NO.

Cynthia, Will you cause Phyllis pain?

CYNTHIA: I MAY.

Is that your intent?

CYNTHIA: NO.

(To both): Will you share each other’s pain and seek to ease it?

PHYLLIS & CYNTHIA: YES.

And so the binding is made. Please join hands.

 

HANDFASTING


(First cord is draped across both their hands by a witness)

Phyllis, will you share Cynthia’s laughter?

PHYLLIS: YES.

Cynthia, will you share Phyllis’s laughter?

CYNTHIA: YES.

(To both): Will both of you look for the brightness in life and the positive in each other?

PHYLLIS & CYNTHIA: YES.

And so the binding is made.

(Second cord is draped across both their hands by another witness)

Cynthia, will you burden Phyllis?

CYNTHIA: I MAY.

Is that your intent?

CYNTHIA: NO.

Phyllis, will you burden Cynthia?

PHYLLIS: I MAY.

Is that your intent?

PHYLLIS: NO.

(To both): Will you share the burdens of each and grow in this union?

PHYLLIS & CYNTHIA: YES.

And so the binding is made.

(Third cord is draped across both their hands by a third witness)

Phyllis, will you share Cynthia’s dreams?

PHYLLIS: YES.

Cynthia, will you share Phyllis’s dreams?

CYNTHIA: YES.

(To both): Will you dream together to create new realities and hopes?

PHYLLIS & CYNTHIA: YES.

And so the binding is made.

(Fourth cord is draped across both their hands)

Phyllis, will you honor Cynthia?

PHYLLIS: I WILL.

Cynthia, will you honor Phyllis?

CYNTHIA: I WILL.

(To both): Will you seek to never give cause to break that honor?

PHYLLIS & CYNTHIA: WE SHALL NEVER DO SO.

And so the binding is made.

(The Celebrant ties the cords together loosely, while saying …)

The knots of this binding are not formed by these cords but instead by your vows. Either of you may drop the cords, for, as always, you hold in your own hands the making of breaking of this union.

(Once cords are tied together they are removed and set aside.)

 

RINGS

The circle has long been the symbol of everlasting love, without beginning or end. May these rings be the symbol of your everlasting love for each other. They represent your uniqueness, yet celebrate the fact that you have chosen to bond together, to allow the presence of another human being to enhance who you are.

As you wear them throughout your life together, they will reflect not only who you are, but also the loving union you are creating together.

Phyllis, please repeat after me:

PHYLLIS: CYNTHIA, PLEASE ACCEPT THIS RING AS A TOKEN OF MY LOVE.  … WITH THIS RING, AND WITH ALL MY HEART, I THEE WED.

Cynthia, please repeat after me:

CYNTHIA: PHYLLIS, PLEASE ACCEPT THIS RING AS A TOKEN OF MY LOVE.  … WITH THIS RING, AND WITH ALL MY HEART, I THEE WED.

 

DECLARATION

Phyllis and Cynthia, so much as you have spoken your promises, have joined hands and exchanged the signs of your commitment each to each in the presence of this company … then by the authority given to me by the City and State of New York, I know pronounce you married.

Please seal this ceremony with your first married kiss.